Saturday, October 31, 2009
I just want to vent..
I feel like my life's a fucking joke.. When one things goes somewhat right, 10 things go wrong.. Went from being really close to my mum, to not talking to each other at all.. Maybe we even hate each other.. idk.. She keeps screwing me over constantly..
work isn't tat great either.. every1 slacks off n my mgr expects me to pick up all their slack n do everything.. while he does nth.. n if i forget to do sth, stupid ppl complain rite away while they can forget like everything.. fantastic isn't it? gettin called late at night cuz the store alarm's not set n my mgr is at disneyland or drunk somewhere..
r/ship.. ha.. idk where to start on that.. u think its so easy just working everyday while u stay home n do nth.. ur stupid parents weigh u for crying out loud.. wtf is wrong with them idk.. n u don't say anything.. just let them walk all over u n ctrl u.. but every lil thing i do, u scrutinize me.. getting tired of ur mood swings, ur yellings.. or saying stuff just to purposely hurt me.. everything is all fun n games until i get pissed.. then i have no right to be pissed cuz u'll just be double pissed at me.. great how things work in ur mind isn't it?!
Getting so tired of everything.. when will the drama end?! zzz.. i don't think it will ever.. y do i continue to suffer.. ppl my age.. they go out, have fun.. I wanna go out w my frenz n chill, u don't want to.. make me feel guilty so i stay home with u.. get mad if i go out drinkin, yet u push me to drinking with ur constant mood swings.. i have so many responsibilities.. n i can't talk to any1 bout them.. not even my family.. I just want all these thoughts out of my head.. I want it all to end..
Retard` rambled @ 2:40 PM
-> 0 Voices In My Head <-
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Going to Long Beach on saT~
YAY! getting away from vegas.. i can't wait.. going to long beach in two days.. finally.. out of this heat n all the crazyness of vegas.. we're goin to the beach!! yay~ can't wait pumpkin.. haha~ lots n lots of eating.. n goin to the beach.. hmm.. fun.. alritey, gotta pack.. :D
Retard` rambled @ 10:56 PM
-> 0 Voices In My Head <-
Monday, May 18, 2009
itchy..
developed a severe allergic reaction to somethin.. still haven't figured out what.. -_-" but i got rashes all over my legs n a lil on my arms too.. haha.. now i'm unwanted.. so itchy~~ went to c doc today.. hope the medz work.. gonna go crash into bed n not wake up until.. idk when.. gd nite~ *gotta resist scratching!*
Retard` rambled @ 9:56 PM
-> 0 Voices In My Head <-
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Uncertainty
Just had dinner w a fren.. how do u respond when some1 tells u they have fallen for you 6months 3days n 4hours ago.. we were just jokin ard.. n i said wow u finally decided to be nice to me.. cuz he offered to walk me to my car.. n the next sentence tat came out of his mouth was kinda shocking.. that really wasn't expected.. its not supposed to happen.. he's just a gd fren to me.. i've known him for so long.. he knows how i think i know how he thinks.. but.. i see him as a brother.. nth else.. i guess i'm breakin his heart again.. cuz i just walked away after telling him the only person i can ever love is some1 else.. sometimes i wonder y i'm such an ass.. but its better off this way.. often times i feel numb n incapable of love.. what really is the word love anyways.. not sure if i'll ever find out the meaning of it.. i guess i'll just be contented the way i am.. and y can't i be frenz w guys without them falling for me? what's wrong with me.. or them.. there really is nth to like bout me.. so.. i oso dunno.. arghz.. life is just too complicated..
// hope pumpkin gets better soon.. :( //
Retard` rambled @ 8:43 PM
-> 0 Voices In My Head <-
Tired..
Finally after a week of workin w seth to tweak my resume i think it looks ready for bartending jobs.. still need some1 to read it over for me to see if its ok.. lol.. any volunteers wanna suffer thru it? :D
ugh.. got a headache now.. gonna go to bed.. i hope u feel better too babe~ hopefully u're not sick.. that would suck..
Retard` rambled @ 12:20 AM
-> 0 Voices In My Head <-
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
1yr 1 month..
Its been a yr and a month.. thank you for putting up with me. Lol.. even tho u'd nvr read this.. I just would like to say thanks..
Retard` rambled @ 6:44 PM
-> 0 Voices In My Head <-
Monday, May 4, 2009
Wine walk on Sat..
I think I decided wine walks r fun.. lol.. shld go to it more often.. next one is month end.. mm.. guess its time to clean my room.. :s any1 wanna help me? lol.. feelin extremely lazy again.. ugh~
Retard` rambled @ 11:12 AM
-> 0 Voices In My Head <-
